Human Missile upgrade planner

Use this planner when you have points and a shop that still looks unfinished. It is a sequence, not a spreadsheet. Official text only promises upgrades that add destruction. We turn that sentence into a path you can run after any publish.

Ranks: upgrade tiers. Catalog: missile upgrades. How-to: how to upgrade. Sibling tool: controls.

First-hour order

1. Do not open the shop until you have landed three real smashes. If you cannot smash, you need getting started, not a purchase.
2. Buy the cheapest destruction row. Tooltip words: destruction, blast, power, explosion.
3. Dive the same cluster five times. If more parts fall, stay in this bucket. If not, screenshot the tooltip and stop buying it.
4. If you still miss houses, buy one control-flavored row. If you hit and the house laughs, buy more destruction.
5. Cosmetics last. Trails do not pay.

That is the whole planner. Write it on a note if you tilt easily.

Decision table

What you feel	What you buy
Bounce, no boom	Nothing. Fix speed via how to score
Boom, little brick	Destruction
Clean launch, constant miss	Control
Loop is easy and funny	Cosmetic, or save
Chat says buy a pass	Nothing. See script safety

After a publish

Run the patch retest. If a new row appears, insert it at step 2 or 4 by tooltip, not by hype. If prices shuffled, still buy one test, not three guesses.

Do not wait for codes to fund step 2. There is no public list. Do not wait for a named legendary on beta items. The planner works on a two-row shop.

Party use

On an eight-player server, read the table out loud once. Then stop shopping together. Split S-tier houses from targets and compare booms after one destruction buy each. That is the only A/B test that matters.

What this planner will never include

Hidden multipliers we did not measure. Script auto-buy. A fake ‘respec’ we have not seen. A countdown to a sale that is not on the Roblox page.

When the shop grows, this page gains a line, not a chapter. Until then, follow the five steps and go back to the pad. The planner succeeded when your next house looks more like the smash gallery and less like a polite knock. If you need motivation to stay in beta while the shelf is small, read the review after the fifth test dive—not before the first buy.

If you tilt after a bounce, do not open the shop as therapy. Open controls and confirm the hold. Buying a row to soothe a missed dive is how C-tier cosmetics get funded. Walk away for one song, then run step 3 again on the same cluster. The planner is a sequence. Skipping to the cash register is how the sequence dies. If you already bought a trail in panic, stop there. Do not ‘balance’ it with a second cosmetic. Return to step 3 on the same cluster and let the next five dives talk.